Marital happiness!

What is on my mind, the Facebook wants to know! Well, this has been on my mind for a long time, really long, almost for the last thirty years when I suppose there was no Facebook. A tricky subject, certainly not for the faint hearted as far as men are concerned. And it is, how come no one thought of designing a meter to measure marital happiness!

There are meters galore, the commonest being the thermometer which is used to read your body temperature. But that is a wrong example, I know. It deals with the physical thing. We are talking about something abstract but very vital for the married folks, especially those who are into this great, even if fading institution (in the west), matrimony for let us say more than ten years. How does one measure or grade a happy marriage!

Of course, in all popular magazines for men and women, almost in every issue, there will be some article, questionnaire or a quiz which deals with this subject, it's challenges and gives out some guidelines if not solutions, to all married couples. What I have in mind is a little different, a set of questions which you need to ask yourself and answer honestly after every social get together you take part in at your own home or outside. These are as follows:-

1. Do you openly support your spouse in any discussion if you agreed with him/ her?

2. If you do not agree, do you go out of your way to oppose and criticise to make it uncomfortable?

3. Do you appreciate your spouse the way he/she was dressed in a gathering?

4. Or do you mentally compare him/her with others and and make your disappointment obvious?

5. If the party is held at your own house, do you make it a point to express your appreciation for doing his/her part so well?

6. Or you show your exasperation for something which did not go as planned?

7. We all have our handicaps, some obvious, some hidden. Do you consciously make an effort not to draw others' attention to his/her such thing?

8. Or just because you were a bit cheesed off with something, you do exactly the opposite?

9. Do you feel happy that he/she gets more attention in a gathering because of some strong point or reason? Especially if it is from the other sex!

10. Or does it make you a bit jealous and unhappy even if it is very fleeting?

If you get positive answers to all the above questions, I feel you will get a reading of a 100 % meaning a very, very happy marriage. But that will be too optimistic. So let us settle for three positive answers and declare it a happy marriage! 

Regardless, I am very happily married;just ask my dear wife!